A few days ago, I was praying and asking God if He would give me some little sign that He loves me and that Jacob is doing well.  That probably sounds silly, because I already know God loves me, and I know Jacob is in Heaven, surely doing well.  But a person needs to be shown love in a unique and special way now and then.  God's love for me is all over the place--in the gorgeous sky, the beautiful flowers, the intricacies of a single leaf.  They shout out to each of us how much God loves us, but at times we need something more.

When I asked for the sign, I told God that it might need to be something rather unusual or I would miss it.  Of course, after asking for a sign, my eyes are usually wide open in anticipation, but "blindness" can still set in.  A couple of days later, as Michael, Raleigh and I sat calmly at the breakfast bar in our kitchen, my earring dropped off my ear.  Nothing unusual about that except when it stopped rolling around, we noticed that the backing was still on the earring!

Michael said right away, "You must have torn your earlobe!" but I couldn't remember doing anything to cause that, and I certainly was in no pain.  I grabbed my earlobe--no blood.  We all tried to figure out how that could have happened.  Hmmm.  Maybe God was saying, "You asked for something rather unusual, and I did it."  It sure caught my attention.

While being very grateful for what might well have been a sign of God's love for me, I explained to God that my earring did not have a Jacob connection.  Was there any way He could give me a "Jacob" sign.  A day or two later, I was out watering my plants when something caught my eye.  A dragonfly almost always perches itself on a metal birdfeeder holder in my garden when I'm outside, so I figured that's what it was.  Much to my surprise, it was a hummingbird hovering in the air nearby.  It was as though it was staring right at me.  After several seconds, it darted off.  For anyone who knows my hummingbird stories, they are definitely a special Jacob connection.  I had not seen a hummingbird in months!  That was my "Jacob" sign from God.  I smiled, laughed, and praised God for His amazing grace and love for me.

For anyne who thinks it is wrong to ask God for signs--that it indicates a lack of faith--I ask you to reconsider.  God loves me.  That's a fact!  I will never forget that.  But on occasion, I ask for a special gesture or sign of His love.  Don't you think our loving Lord delights in showing His love for us, especially in very individual ways?  He wants us to know His love for us more than anything else.  If we long for Him, He loves to show up.  In His perfect time, and in His perfect way.  We just have to open our eyes and drink in His goodness. 

Who, more than God, knows how much I  miss Jacob?  Who, more than God, knows how much I love Jacob?  Don't you think He enjoys reminding me that Jacob is safely right there with Him?  God knows my heart more than anyone.  He knows I'm not asking for proof that He exists, that He loves me, or that Jacob is there in Heaven with Him.  He knows I'm just asking for a sweet reminder.  Just as a husband or wife loves to do something special for a spouse, or a parent longs to express love to a child, God delights in showing His love for us in very individualized ways.  The problem is we don't look for His love, or we are afraid to ask.  It would break my heart to know my child longed for something but never asked out of fear that I would refuse or consider it wrong.  It would break my heart if I was expressing my love to my husband, but he never bothered to notice.  God's love is FAR greater than any love I have, so it makes perfect sense that he enjoys giving us signs of His love, even when we ask for it.

During the five weeks Jacob was in college before his accident, he had written several papers and completed a number of assignments.  Among the papers and assignments found in his dorm room, there were answers he had written in response to questions posed by his philosophy professor. While we never found the actual questions, the answers were still interesting. 

In response to one question, Jacob wrote, "Belief in God is necessary, because He can fulfill dreams."  Those words seemed a little shallow at first.  They made God sound like Santa Claus or a genie in a bottle who fulfills every wish.  Jacob's faith was deep and mature, so it was a little surprising to find a comment like this from him.

Yesterday (July 6, 2008), it felt like Jacob revealed to me (his mom) the meaning behind those words for the first time.  It was as though he was sitting right next to me explaining what he really meant.  He wasn't saying all our dreams will come true if we just believe in God.  He also wasn't saying that God will give us the house, car, fame, fortune, or person we dream of if we believe in him.  What he meant was that GOD HIMSELF is the fulfillment of every dream we have ever had.  GOD ALONE can satsify our every desire, but belief in Him is necessary if that is to happen.  When the clarity of his comment finally emerged, I literally gasped and apologized to Jacob out loud for taking so long to get it.  I could see his sweet, understanding smile and hear his tender laughter.  These are the ways Jacob continues to teach me, even from Heaven.  Thank you, God.  Thank you, Jacob. 

Our family computer crashed right around the time of Jacob's high school graduation in May, 2006.  I had begun writing a letter to him on the computer that I wanted to give him after graduation.  The letter was never finished, and the computer crashed before I had time to get back to it.  For a long time the computer just sat in a closet.  After Jacob died, we knew we wanted to see if we could save what was on that computer since there would be pictures of Jacob and other Jacob memories.  We finally got what was able to be saved a few months ago.  Recently, I was looking through some of the documents on the computer.  That's when I came upon this unfinished letter to Jacob.  My heart nearly stopped to read what I had written four months before Jacob died.  The letter almost seemed prophetic.

Dear Jacob,

Almost 19 years ago I sat at a desk hand writing a letter to the baby I just found out was alive inside of me. The doctor had given me confirmation that my greatest dream was coming true--I was going to be a mother, and I wanted to tell you exactly how I was feeling at that moment. Yet words could never do it justice. That very same day, I made a promise to God. I told Him that the beautiful and precious gift he had just given me was exactly what I was going to give Him in return. I vowed to raise my child up to know Him and to love Him. I knew that you were mine for only just a time, and that my time with you was a chance to give Him the best gift I could possibly imagine--the gift of another child who would serve Him.

Today, I sit at a computer and find myself writing a letter to that same little boy only now he is a young man. Instead of contemplating the life that lies ahead for us, I am remembering with tears in my eyes all the wonderful moments, days, and years we have had together. How is it possible that God could be so good to me and allow me to have shared this lifetime of yours with you?

You have never really been mine, but everything in my soul desires to hold on to you and never let you go. But I know that’s not what is best for you.

That's where the letter ended.  I was saying I never wanted to let him go, but I knew holding on was not the best for him.  Did something in my spirit know he was leaving?  So many things took place that last weekend Jacob was with us that indicate I knew somehow.  Now, I've had to let him go.  Jacob is with Jesus in Heaven.  Somehow, that must be what is best for him, even if it is difficult for me to understand such a reality.

     Is it possible to hear a voice from Heaven?  As a young girl, I heard a male voice call out my name in the middle of the night as I lay in bed. This event never frightened me, but it made me wonder where the voice came from.  Although I didn't attend church regularly as a child, I felt pretty certain the voice was from Heaven--either God's voice or that of an angel.  A few weeks or even months after Jacob's death, I heard Jacob's voice as clear as ever say, "Hey Mom!"  That's exactly how he used to greet me every morning or when he called me on the phone.  Where had his voice come from that morning?  Was it merely my mind spontaneously playing out something it had heard hundreds of times or was it Jacob's voice coming from Heaven?

     On the morning of August 5, 2007, as I sat up in bed, I heard a male voice clearly say, "Put them together."  What in the world did that mean?  I even repeated the words aloud to myself.  What was I supposed to put together?  Michael was already out for his Sunday morning run, Raleigh was still sleeping, and no one else was in our house, so who had I just heard?

     The phone started ringing, and it was my friend Kim calling to say she had experienced her first dream with Jacob since his death.  She was excited and asked if she could come over to tell us about it.  The night before, I had prayed with Raleigh, asking God to allow her to have a dream with Jacob since it had been a long time since her last dream with him.  I wondered if in reference to Kim's dream and Raleigh's dream I was supposed to "Put them together."  Of course, I had no assurance Raleigh had even had a dream about Jacob since she wasn't awake yet.

     By the time Kim got to the house, Michael was back from his run.  We were excited to hear about Kim's dream in which we were together on a Nyenhuis/Belt family vacation like we had done many times in real life.  Jacob had been to the beach and was tan.  His smile was brilliant, and he looked wonderful.  Kim and Jacob talked about something Jacob had not finished while he was here.  As is typical of many of the dreams people have had, Kim knew Jacob had died, but she was talking to him about something he had not finished before his death.  My curiousity was piqued, and I could not help but wonder if Raleigh had a dream that matched Kim's somehow, and I was supposed to put them together.

     When Raleigh got up, I was disappointed to hear she didn't have a dream about Jacob.  A few minutes later, she came to me and said, "I didn't dream about Jacob, but I did have a dream that it was time for us to see Matt now."  Up to this point, we had not seen Matt, who was in the accident with Jacob, because he did not know that Jacob had been with him and had died.  Matt's parents had been advised not to tell Matt about Jacob until he was ready.  They were told to wait until Matt asked specific questions about the accident.  They had wisely heeded that advice.  When Matt's friends visited, they knew not to mention Jacob's death.

     Feeling frustrated that the phrase spoken by the voice that morning wasn't making any more sense than it did when I first heard it, we went on to church.  I wondered if there would be some powerful sermon that morning that would help me unravel the mystery.  Nope.  Nothing!  Michael had decided at the last minute to attend the church our friend is the pastor of rather than our regular church.  As a result, we ended up in Brunswick, so we had to cancel lunch plans we had made with family friends on the island. 

     We ate lunch at one of our favorite Mexican restaurants in Brunsiwck.  Just as we were walking out to the car, Matt's parents were getting out of their car to walk into the restaurant.  It was the first time the four of us had seen each other since shortly after the accident.  Ten months had passed.  The timing was perfect.  We didn't have the awkwardness of standing in the middle of the restaurant and greeting one another.  Instead, we were able to sit outside together at a picnic table.  We talked and cried and prayed together for over an hour.

     Somewhere in the midst of our time together, I finally understood what the voice meant when it said, "Put them together."  I realized the voice was not telling me to put anything together.  Instead, it was God or an angel telling other angels to "Put them together."  What were those angels to put together?  Jacob's parents and Matthew's parents.  Again, the timing was perfect.  We weren't even planning to be in Brunswick for lunch, and Matthew's parents had not been to that particular restaurant in over ten months, since before the accident.  We all came together at one moment.  God had orchestrated the whole thing from Heaven and we cooperated.  We could have chosen different places or different times, but we didn't.

     I decided to share Raleigh's dream from that morning.  She had been told it was time for us to see Matt.  When I mentioned the dream, it struck a chord.  Why?  Exactly one week earlier, Matt had asked questions about the accident that led to him being told about Jacob.  Raleigh's dream revealed the truth that Matt did know about Jacob.  God was letting us know through her dream.

     Voices from Heaven and messages from God through dreams.  Yes, they really do occur.  We had just lived them out in our own lives.  Both of them in one day.  God is so amazing!  On top of that, Michael and I celebrated our 24-year anniversary the very next day.  We talked over dinner of how wonderful God has been to us, but we wondered if the miracles and blessings would end.  After dinner, we went to the cemetery to "visit" with Jacob.  As we got out of the car and began walking into the cemetery, we were stunned to see four deer standing right next to the area where Jacob's ashes are stored.  Yes, it was a family of four deer--two adult deer and two young deer.  All four of them lifted their heads and stared at us for a few seconds.  Time seemed to stop.  Then, they turned and jumped over the brick fence.  All of them except the littlest, who had to scoot around the end of the fence because she was too small.

     Voices from Heaven.  Dreams from God.  Anniversary gifts from beyond the grave or the Heavenly realm.  They all are real and meant to be enjoyed.  Believe!

On March 16, 2008, I was sitting in Jacob's room.  I've only recently begun going through the boxes and piles of things that are in his room.  While I was in there, I began thinking about the ways I might be able to experience Jacob's presence and the ways he might be able to spend a few moments with us.  Scripture tells us that our bodies will be glorious, like Jesus Christ's body after His resurrection.  Jesus had a body that could eat food, be felt by others, walk through walls, and take on different forms.  In the book of Mark, it says that Jesus took on a different form when He walked with the two men in the country who were on their way to Emmaus.  As a result, these men could not recognize Jesus, but later, when it was revealed to them who He was, they remembered the burning in their hearts as they walked with Him.  While Jacob is not Jesus, and I don't ever want to suggest that in any way, Scripture tells us our bodies will be like that of Jesus, so why couldn't Jacob take on a different form, even if just for a few moments?

As I thought more about this, I prayed, "God, please remove these thoughts from me if this is not how You work, or if this is not in Your will.  I do not want to dishonor You or be deceived in any way.  I want to live in Your truth and trust only Your ways."  Then, I set those ideas aside, trusting God to let me know one way or another.

Later that afternoon, Michael and I went up to Christ Church Cemetery where Jacob's ashes are kept.  We had not been there together in months.  While we were there, I kept looking at Jacob's senior picture that we had laminated and tucked behind the nameplate.  Being there with Michael felt a little awkward only because I had gone alone so many times.  I usually sit and pray to God or carry on a one-way conversation with Jacob.  Then I call Jacob's cell phone and leave a message.  After a few minutes, we decided to walk across to the Wesley gardens and enjoy the absolutely perfect weather.  As we walked, my heart was heavy.  I noticed a couple of high school or college-aged boys walking our direction.  I kept my head down because I knew it would hurt to look at them.  Why couldn't Jacob be here enjoying this wonderful day with his friends? 

When the boys got closer, one said "Hi!  How are you doing?" with a very kind and cheerful voice.  I quickly glanced up and looked at him just as he was passing by.  My heart skipped a beat and I turned to look at him again.  I could have sworn I saw Jacob's smile in the one who said hello, and it took my breath away.  Then I remembered the thoughts I had while I was in Jacob's room earlier that day.  My heart burned inside.  Was that Jacob, here for just a moment to say hello and see how we were doing?  If so, he would have seen Michael and I walking hand in hand.  He would have been happy to see that.  My eyes filled with tears, but tears of joy.

No, I can't swear that Jacob came in a different form.  But it makes me wonder if God didn't move my thoughts in that direction earlier in the day, so that I would be prepared to receive a sweet gift that afternoon.  All I know is that for a moment, I felt like Jacob was with us, and it was wonderful.

     We have no doubt that in Heaven we will have friends--friends we never had here on this earth.  With that in mind, it is very possible we just spent time with the parents of one of Jacob's new friends in Heaven.  To help you understand this better, we will give you a little background:

     Several months ago, Michael found two days in his jam-packed schedule that were actually open.  It just so happened those were the same exact days a conference was being held in Arkansas.  Michael had been invited to attend this conference in the past but could never manage to fit into his schedule.  The only problem was that this particular conference I am speaking of was only a couple of weeks away.  In all likelihood, it was probably already filled since there were only a dozen or so spots available in all.  On a whim, Michael asked his assistant to check on it.  Much to their surprise, a spot was available!
     While Michael was there with this small group of about a dozen men from around the country, he met Steve from Tulsa, Oklahoma.  Steve learned during a time of introductions that Michael had lost a son, a freshman in college, in a car accident.  Michael's partner had asked if he could share the story of losing Jacob as he introduced Michael to the rest of the group.  As Steve introduced himself, he shared with Michael that he had lost his daughter, Bethany, also a freshman in college, in a car accident.  Bethany's accident had occurred exactly 7 weeks after Jacob's accident.  These two fathers formed an immediate bond.
     The following morning, Michael shared with Steve that he had asked God to allow Jacob and Bethany to meet in Heaven and to let them know that their dads had met one another on earth.  Steve was very moved by the idea of such a tangible and normal encounter in Heaven between his daughter and a new friend.
     Shortly after the conference, Steve was driving in his car when he had a vision.  He "heard" laughter and recognized Bethany's voice.  She said to Steve, "You dads think you put Jacob and I together?  We met in eternity and put you two dads together!"  Steve gladly shared that vision with Michael, leaving both of them rather taken aback at the thought of their children in Heaven causing them to meet.  Was it possible that Jacob and Bethany could influence their fathers' lives from Heaven?  That idea turned their old perspective completely on its head.
     Steve emailed Michael a picture of Bethany shortly after the conference.  For the next several days and even weeks, we stared at Bethany's beautiful face and wondered if we were looking at one of Jacob's new friends.  In fact, we were quite convinced of it.

     Last week, we had the pleasure of staying with Steve and his wonderful wife, Judy, in Tulsa.  We shared dinner with them in their home, spending several hours exchanging stories that would have blow a person's mind to hear all of their tories and ours packed into five hours.  The evidence of the thinness of the veil between here and Heaven was indisputable.  We knew we were not the only ones this was happening to, but what a blessing to hear stories as "beyond this world" as our own.  Their dreams as well as the dreams of those around them are as powerful as the dreams we and others have had of Jacob.  One friend even called that very morning to tell of a dream in which Bethany appeared--a dream that served to affirm that Bethany's destiny is in fact being fulfilled in the glory of Heaven.  We talked until we dropped.  All four of us could not help but wonder if Bethany and Jacob were allowed to be part of our gathering that evening.  It would not surprise any of us.
     In the morning, we stopped in Bethany's room before making our way down to the kitchen.  The moment we stepped into Steve and Judy's house, we felt like we were with old friends whom we had known for years.  As we stood in Bethany's room, it felt like we were sharing in the fellowship of the friendship Bethany and Jacob share in Heaven as well.
     Conversation flowed easily again that morning as we touched on a variety of topics.  In what seemed like only minutes, our time was almost over, but before leaving, Michael had asked to have the privilege of watering the crepe myrtle that had recently been planted in memory of Bethany to mark the one-year anniversary.  Bethany's ashes had been placed beneath the tree.  The two fathers prayed together and each took a watering can and watered the crepe myrtle that was enjoying its winter "sleep".  No doubt, the pink flowers that emerge this summer will be more radiant than any we have ever seen, simply because the beauty of Bethany will be in them.
    
     As we hugged goodbye and drove away, we could not help but be in awe of God's amazing goodness to have brought us all together for such a wonderful time of fellowship and encouragement.  Of course, we all knew Jacob and Bethany were probably behind it as well--two amazing young people who loved the Lord during their time here on earth but who now stand in His very presence in Heaven.  What Amazing Grace!
    

     Michael and I recently had the opportunity to have lunch with an older Jacob.  Of course, it wasn't really our Jacob, and his name was actually Paul.  But for all intents and purposes, it sure seemed like it could have been Jacob, just 50+ years down the road.
     Paul is a real estate developer, but instead of  Miami, Paul enjoyed southern California as a young man and bought up acres and acres of land.  While Paul enjoyed great success as a real estate developer, he also got involved in a variety of other interests.  His heart was big, and he wanted to help other people live a better life.  In that spirit, he developed a foundation.  That foundation now serves to improve the lives of people all over the globe who are poor, suffering, or oppressed.
     Paul's heart and Jacob's heart are alike.  They enjoyed the benefits that success in the business world could bring, but they knew that wasn't enough.  Life is about so much more than our own little world and the things we acquire.  Life is about reaching out to people in need and helping them to help themselves.
     Jacob never lived long enough on this earth to form his foundation, but God has given Paul many years here to see his dream fulfilled in his lifetime.  With Jacob's vision in mind, Jacob's dad and I, along with others who know and love Jacob, have begun his foundation and are blessed to watch it develop and grow.  God has been gracious to us in this process.  So much has happened in such a short period of time--evidence of His hand at work on Jacob's behalf.
     As Michael and I sat across from Paul, we didn't know whether to laugh or cry at the similarities between Jacob and him.  In the end, we cried.  Why?  Because Paul shared something with us that we did not know prior to meeting him at lunch that day.  Paul had lost his son to cancer only five years earlier.  His son, Matt, was only in his early 30's.  Much too soon in our eyes.  Matt believed fully in what his dad was doing through the foundation, and that is what drives Paul to continue working hard to this day.  He could have retired long ago, but his love for his son and his heart toward others in need give him the energy to keep at it.  Bless him!
     May Michael and I have the privilege and honor to continue to do the work of Jacob's foundation for several more decades--well past our own retirement years.
     Paul has expressed great interest in the work of the J9 Foundation.  Wouldn't that be amazing if the "older Jacob" would choose to partner with us in some way to fulfill the dreams of the younger Jacob?  God willing, that is exactly what could happen.  And you know what?  Knowing the goodness of God, that wouldn't surprise me in the least--but I'd still be humbled beyond belief.

Just a quick update on this topic... This amazing foundation I written about here has provided The J9 Foundation with funds to help clearly document our procedures, materials, lessons learned, etc. from the J9 entrepreneur program in Kenya.  With strong documentation and evaluation, they are very interested in helping us take this program to other places in Africa as well.  An older "Jacob" is helping to take Jacob's dreams to even more places around the world.  What an honor and a blessing!

Dreams
     Jacob's family members (Mom, Dad and Raleigh) have each had dreams involving Jacob since his death.  In one of his mom's first dreams, Jacob's best friend Bobby came into a room where she was sitting and began searching through a backpack.  She asked him what he was doing and he said, "Oh we're just playing some video games."  That's when Jacob walked into the room and flashed his big smile at her.  She jumped up and ran to him calling out his name.  When she took hold of Jacob's arm she could literally "feel" his skin and the material of his shirt.  She knew it couldn't possibly be a dream because people can't feel texture and skin in dreams, but she also knew Jacob had died.  Was he being allowed to return in the flesh for a time, she wondered.  As she held tightly to his arm, he began moving to a corner of the room.  For a moment, she glanced away.  When she turned back, it was Raleigh she was holding onto.  She had a strong sense of Jacob saying, "Mom, I have to go away for now, but you still have Raleigh.  Take hold of her and care for her.  She needs you."

     A common theme in some of his mom's dreams was having the ability to tell Jacob to do something different so he wouldn't have his accident.  One dream took place in a lounge on the campus of UGA.  They were sitting together talking on a couch.  When it was time to leave one another, they stood up and hugged and Jacob walked across the room.  At that moment, his mom realized the accident had not yet taken place and that she could tell him how to avoid the accident.  She called out to Jacob in hopes of getting him to come back.  He heard her and turned around.  As he was walking back toward her, his mom realized she was facing a moral dilemma.  She could either allow life to unfold naturally while trusting God, or she could take control of the future by telling Jacob about the accident.  Just as Jacob stepped in front of her, she wanted to tell him to do something to avoid the accident.  That's the moment she awoke from her dream.  She never got to tell him.

     Another dream took place on a porch where Jacob was sitting around a table with a couple of other people.  When his mom walked up, she was aware of the accident but saw he had not yet died.  Again, she had a chance to do something that would help him avoid the accident.  She did not want to say anything in front of the other people at the table, so she waited until he was ready to leave.  As soon as she saw him leaving, she ran to catch up with him to tell him what to do.  There was no sense of a moral dilemma in this particular dream.  Just as she was about to tell him about the accident, she woke up.  She felt as though she was being told that even though she would love to change what happened, it was not within her control and that God was in control.  She had to decide whether or not to trust God with Jacob's life and death.

     Jacob's sister Raleigh had a series of dreams with a common theme.  In those dreams, when Jacob appeared, she began telling him that everyone thought he was dead.  He would always say, "I know that's what everyone thinks, but I'm not!"  Each time she woke up after hearing Jacob say that, she felt close to him.  Another dream that was similar, but took a slightly different twist, took place in a movie theater.  Jacob was sitting a few people down from her.  He leaned forward, turned to Raleigh and said, "People are telling you that something is going to happen, but it might not."

     Jacob's dad has had dreams, but two of them have been extremely powerful.  The first one took place shortly after Jacob's death.  Unlike most of his dreams, this one was very vivid.  The details were numerous and clear.  A shortened version is that he was walking along a path with a backpack on when he noticed a huge storm approaching from behind him.  He began to hurry and followed the path into a city with buildings on both sides of the road or alley way.  The rain was coming down hard now.  As he kept walking, he saw a large, black hand reaching down trying to grab him.  It kept coming at him over and over again, but could never actually touch him.  When he awoke, the room was dark and he felt an evil presence.  He began praying out loud for it to leave.  After a few minutes he knew it was gone.  Jacob's dad is not one to experience an "evil presence" in the spiritual realm, much less pray it away.  While this dream may not have included Jacob, you will see how it prefaced a supernatural encounter he had later that morning.  You will find that account under the heading "supernatural occurrences."

     The second dream directly involved Jacob, and his dad had this dream the night after he and Jacob's mom went to the site of the accident for the first time.  Being there was obviously a very intense time for them, but his dad's dream brought great comfort to him.  In the dream, Jacob was home for the weekend.  He was getting ready to head back to some place, but in the dream, his dad wasn't sure if he was heading back to college or to heaven.  He was aware that Jacob had died in the accident, but didn't want to say that specifically for fear of affecting  Jacob's presence somehow.
     When Jacob's dad stepped into his room, Jacob was getting his backpack ready to leave, just as he did the last weekend he was home.  Jacob looked up at his dad and said, "Dad, when I told you earlier that I couldn't go with you, it's not because I don't want to be with you."  His dad's response was, "Jacob, I know that in this new mode of life you're in, you need to be away from us and that's okay."  His dad knew in the dream that he needed to choose his words carefully which is why he said, "in this new mode of life" rather than "now that you're in college" or "now that you're in heaven."  That dream is the only one in which his Dad has actually communicated with Jacob in words and the words were very meaningful because he was telling Jacob it was okay that they couldn't be together.  It was as though he was releasing Jacob to fully enjoy his life in heaven.

     The dream Jacob's mom had the night after visiting the accident site was very simple but heartwarming.  She and Jacob were separated by a tall barrier of some sort.  It wasn't just a wall or a fence where you could see where it ended.  The height and width was not able to be determined.  There was a vertical gap or a split in the barrier that allowed them to see one another.  The space was not wide enough for either of them to pass through, but they were able to put their faces up to the  gap and kiss one another.  It was as though the veil between heaven and earth parted in order for them to connect with one another just briefly in a sweet and loving way.

     One day in March, Jacob's mom was asking God to allow her to see God in everything around her, to see Jacob, and to see heaven.  It had been nearly six months since she had seen her son, and she was longing to know more about heaven.  Above all else, she wanted to have eyes to see God in every situation and every thing.  She did not want to miss the divine thatis still in the world around her now that her heart was broken and her son was no longer with her.
     That night, she had a dream that she was standing on a sidewalk looking up at a building that displayed beautiful architecture.  She commented to the person standing next to her that she wished Jacob could see the building because he would have loved it.  Slowly, she began to rise up in the air and was able to see the building more fully and was impressed even more by its beauty.  She then recognized it as a building that was on the campus of UGA.  As she was hovering in the air, she turned to her left and saw Jacob also hovering in the air about 50 feet or so from where she was.  All around him in the air were circles that were spinning with what appeared to be the color spectrum like that of a prism.  It was beautiful!  She called out to Jacob and he turned towards her and smiled.  They began flying toward one another at great speed, much like a hummingbird can hover and dart about quickly.  When they reached each other, Jacob continued to fly right past her.  She turned around and said to Jacob, "Hey, where are you going?"  He stopped, turned around and laughed before coming back to her.  
     That is all there was to the dream, but his mom felt like she was given an answer to her prayer and was given a tiny glimpse into heaven.  There were buildings and beautiful colors all around, and people were able to fly about quickly and effortlessly like hummingbirds.  Heaven may be nothing like that, but it sure was a wonderful image.

          Other people have had dreams about Jacob and they have meant so much to them as well as Jacob's family.  One person had a dream three nights after Jacob died.  Jacob came to this person and said, "Tell my mom I'm okay, and that I'm learning a new dance and I'm dancing with Jesus!"  The woman who had this dream said it was much more vivid than a typical dream.

     Another friend had a dream.  She was kneeling on the ground and Jacob anointed her head with oil.  She has never been anointed with oil, so she had no previous experience she was drawing from for this dream.  Jacob's face was very clear to her.  In the dream, she knew she was not to touch Jacob, but Jacob was able to reach out and touch her to anoint her with the oil.  Later, when she told Jacob's mom about the dream, tears were in her eyes because of how profound the dream was for her.

     A friend from church told Jacob's mom and dad about a dream she had of Jacob.  She was riding a chair lift at a ski resort when she looked down and saw Jacob snowboarding down the hill.  He called up to her and said, "Hey Mrs. Sandy!  I'm in heaven!" and kept on snowboarding down the hill.  As this friend told them about the dream, she was simply beaming.

     Recently, a close friend of Jacob's had a dream. In the dream, he had found a seashell out at the beach.  When he got home, he searched all over for it and was frustrated that he couldn't find it. Then Jacob walked into his room and handed him the shell saying, "Go to the beach and have fun." Jacob and this friend spent countless hours at the beach together over the years, but getting back out there has been painful and hard. Perhaps God allowed Jacob to tell him it was time to get back to the beach again.


Visions
     Ten days after the accident, Jacob's mom had a vision that took place while she was flying back from Athens after she and Jacob's dad had visited with Matt's parents in the ICU in Athens.  The way his mom would describe the vision is that a movie screen had been placed about a foot before her eyes and she saw it play out on that screen.  The vision was of the night of the accident.  It was very dark and rain was falling.  Her perspective in the vision was from approximately 20 feet in the air above the back left corner of the car.  The accident had just occurred and Jacob was still in the vehicle.  A large black hand grabbed Jacob around his torso lifting him out of the vehicle while saying, "I'm going to tear this family apart!"  At that moment, she saw who she knew was Jesus.  He took hold of Jacob's hand and arm and said, "Let go of him!  This one is mine!"  The hand instantly released Jacob and he was taken away into the air.

     A good friend of the Nyenhuis family had a vision one morning as he was getting out of bed.  He had never experienced having a vision, so it took him quite by surprise.  He also described it as a scene playing out before him.  In the vision, he was standing in the parking lot of a local church after attending a funeral.  He was talking to and consoling someone when he saw something out of the corner of his eye.  As he turned to see what it was, he realized it was Jacob.  He was running out of the church and dashing down the steps so fast that his feet didn't even touch the ground. Jacob turned to look at him and smiled as if to say, "We are having the time of our lives here!" and continued on toward the beach.  He said Jacob looked like a million bucks in the vision and was clearly very happy.

What About You?
     Other people have also had dreams or visions that involved Jacob or some aspect of his death.  If you have had one yourself, let his family know about it.  These dreams mean a lot to them, even if they don't seem like much to you.  There have been similar themes in many of the dreams people have had, and that brings them a sense of comfort and peace.  Even if the dream doesn't make sense to you, feel free to share it with them.  Dreams can simply be part of our subconcious working though life events, but they can also be a word from God.  Your dream will only be included on this website if you want it to be, or your dream can be included but not your name.  These things serve as a real encouragement to many people all around the world, so it's wonderful being able to share them.
    

     A variety of things happened in the days preceding September 24, 2006 and since then that might be nothing more than coincidence.  However, some are so peculiar that they go beyond mere happenstance.  You be the judge.

     Three weeks before his death, Jacob's mom sent an email to Jacob that said one of the things she feared most was hydroplaning.  She felt that way because in the midst of hydroplaning, even the most skilled and experienced driver could not control the vehicle.  As many of you know, Jacob's accident was the result of his car hydroplaning.  The week before he died, Jacob's mom sent an email to him with the subject heading "Letting Go."  The subject had nothing to do with death, but it seemed almost prophetic as she looked back at it after the accident.

     The Wednesday before Jacob's accident, his mom ordered the book 90 Minutes in Heaven, an account of a man's death in a car accident, his time spent in Heaven, and his return to life on this earth.  Two days after Jacob's car accident, this book was delivered to her front door by their mailman who simply hugged her with tears in his eyes as he said, "I know."  But what he didn't know is that he was delivering a book that was another piece in God's preparation for Jacob's death.  The words in that book became a balm for Jacob's mom's wounded soul.

     On the night of Jacob's accident, his mom was at home working on a Bible study.  At one point in the study, she was told to list in the margin of the book ways that her faith might be destroyed.  She had forgotten about that until a couple of days after the accident when she was looking back through her study.  At almost the exact moment of the accident she was writing  "the death of a child" as one of the ways her faith could possibly be destroyed.
     In hindsight, she was amazed to see how God was preparing her for what was about to happen.  She believes that God gave her the opporunity to acknowledge that her child's death could cause a crisis in her faith  because her faith was indeed about to be tested in that very way.  Another sign of preparation occurred earlier that day.  After church, she and Jacob had a conversation about heaven and what it would be like.  Little did either of them know that he would be in heaven less than 10 hours later.

     Jacob's laptop computer was in his backpack in the trunk of his car at the time of the accident. Amazingly, the only damage it suffered was a cracked screen. A friend whose specialty is working with computers offered to remove everything off the hard drive and send the computer back to Dell to get the screen replaced. He didn't charge Jacob's parents for his work, but they did have a bill from Dell for the cost of replacing the screen.
     Jacob's mom and dad were planning to have dinner with this friend and his wife shortly after the computer had been repaired and sent back to him. The bill had been sent to the friend as well, so he let Jacob's dad know how much it was. Before leaving for dinner, Jacob's mom asked how much she needed to make the check out for. When his dad stated the amount, she could hardly believe it and asked his dad to repeat the amount.
     Before handing the check over to this friend, Jacob's mom had to ask him directly how much the cost of the repair was because she still could not believe the amount. It wasn't that the bill was too high. She just couldn't believe how uncanny it was to see the amount written out. The charge was $421.88. What a peculiar amount for a bill. But what was really strange s that Jacob's birthday is on April 21, 1988 which is written 4/21/88. Look back at the amount of the bill.
     Just a coincidence? The Nyenhuis family doesn't think so. They see it as a sign from God letting them know He is in control and that Jacob is safe and sound in His arms but also having a blast doing all kinds of great and amazing things in heaven. None of which involves sitting around on clouds and floating about as a vapor while singing endless church hymns.  That would bore him to death--even in heaven.  Now dancing and climbing mountains... that's a different thing all together. 

     Jacob's family had just returned from being away for the weekend.  As his mom was unpacking her suitcase, she noticed that three hangers were sticking out at an odd angle from her closet.  She pointed to the hangers and asked Jacob's dad if he had put those in there.  He had not.  She then went to Raleigh and asked her the same question.  Raleigh had not put them in their either.
     The hangers in her closet would not have gotten his mom's attention except that they were the hangers she had bought Jacob for his dorm room at UGA.  When they were moving Jacob into the dorm, his mom started putting the hangers in his closet.  Jacob's dad laughed and said, "He's not going to need hangers.  Do you really think he's going to take the time to hang things up?"  The whole family got a good laugh, but Jacob's mom put them in the closet anyway.
     Jacob's dorm room had to be cleared out after his accident.  A friend of the family offered to take on that particular responsibility, and the Nyenhuis family was deeply grateful that they did not have to endure such a painful task so soon after Jacob's death.  All of Jacob's items were placed in boxes that eventually ended up in his bedroom back at home.  (By the way, the hangers were being used and Jacob had kept his room very neat.)  These same hangers were in one of the boxes in Jacob's room.  
     His mom had been in Jacob's room only a couple of times up to this point because it was still so painful to walk in and see his things.  She had noticed the hangers but never took them out  for her own use.  Everything of Jacob's had taken on a near sacred quality, and the thought of removing those hangers and using them for practical purposes was not even a remote possibility.
     When Jacob's mom set the hangers down on the bed after finding them, his dad said, "Look at those hangers.  You can see a 'J' and an 'S' in the handle.  'Jacob' and 'Sandy'."  No one had noticed that before.  His mom began to laugh.  There was no reasonable explanation for how those hangers got placed in her closet.  She couldn't help but wonder if Jacob wasn't getting the last laugh about those hangers she made him take to college.

     One Sunday night, Raleigh was home alone doing some homework.  She was sitting on the bed in her room.  Her ceiling fan that is directly above the bed has four separate lights at the bottom.  While she was studying, one of the bulbs in her ceiling fan light burned out.  That seemed a little odd to her because she was used to a light burning out with a "pop" right when she turned the light on rather than while it was lit.  About 15 minutes later, another bulb burned out.  She started to feel a little weird and wondered what was going on, but she got back to her work.  A little while later, a third bulb went out on her.  All three bulbs burned out in less than an hour, all while she was studying alone in her bedroom!  Who knows what caused three lights to burn out so quickly, but she couldn't help but wonder if her brother wasn't involved somehow.

     On Sept. 22nd, the day Jacob came home from UGA, Jacob's mom saw a hummingbird at the feeder in their yard for the very first time.  She told Jacob about it when he got home late that afternoon, and he thought that was great.  He had never seen one either.  His mom also shared with him the sad news from that morning about a little bird flying into the window of the side door of their house and dying instantly, probably due to a broken neck or head injury.  
     During the next week, each time Jacob's mom and dad sat outside to make plans for Jacob's memorial service, multiple hummingbirds were at the feeder.  She even watched as some would sit in the branches of the pomegranate bush right next to the feeder.  She couldn't help but feel comforted at the sight of them and wondered if Jacob had asked God to send them for that very purpose.
     When Jacob's aunt and uncle from Wisconsin arrived, they shared the story and the video of what took place the afternoon Jacob's aunt had to tell his cousins about his death.  They had been discussing it on their walk home from school.  It was hard news for them to hear because they had spent three weeks with Jacob's family the summer before and gotten to know Jacob better than ever.  They sat in the backyard when they got home and noticed their dogs start to fuss over something near the back fence.  It ended up being a little bird.  Surprisingly, the dogs didn't harm the bird at all, and the bird allowed them to pick it up and hold it in their hands.  They even placed the bird on their heads and it did not fly away.  The video they took is proof of this.  After several minutes, the bird eventually flew away, but everyone was feeling happier because of it.  As she listened to this story and watched the video, Jacob's mom couldn't help but wonder if Jacob hadn't asked God to send that bird to comfort his cousins as they received the horrible news of his death.
     Back to the hummingbirds...
     After the memorial service, Jacob's mom never saw another hummingbird at the feeder.  Until Jacob's birthday.  On April 21st, a hummingbird was spotted at the feeder once again.  She saw many of them over the next few days, but again, they seemed to almost disappear overnight.  The next time she saw a hummingbird was in July as she was on the phone talking with a dear friend about Matthew and Jacob.  This time it was a ruby-throated hummingbird.  Absolutely breathtaking!

     The summer before he left for college, Jacob's mom had a certain playlist on her iTunes that she loved listening to. One day Jacob walked in as she was playing something from that playlist and he said, “Mom, those songs you listen to sound so sad.” She told him he was right, but for some reason she really like them. There was something about them that touched her on a very deep level. 
     A few months after Jacob’s death, she was looking through her iTunes when she came across that same playlist from last summer. There was a column that she had never noticed before titled “Last Played” which gave the date and time each particular song was last played.  Her eyes scanned the column and quickly noticed the date 9/24/2006 which is the day of Jacob’s accident. It said the song was played shortly after Jacob left the house that afternoon.  Her curiosity got the best of her, so she looked to see what the song was. Much to her amazement, it was the song “Heaven When We’re Home.” The title simply took her breath away. 

     As mentioned in the "Dreams and Visions" section above, One day in March, Jacob's mom had asked God to allow her to see God in everything around her, to see Jacob, and to see heaven.  That night she had a dream with Jacob where she felt like they were in heaven together.  She also got to "see" Jacob in a more tangible way.  Here's what happened:
     The following day, as she was running errands on the island, Jacob's mom was stopped behind several cars at a stop sign. She found herself gazing into the outside mirror of the car in front of her where she could see the reflection of the driver. Suddenly, it occurred to her that the person's reflection looked just like Jacob. She froze for a moment but felt a sense of peace wash over her as she seemed to be looking at her son in the flesh again. In that moment, she also realized it felt as though it had only been a matter of days since she last saw him even though nearly six months had already passed. She wondered if that's what it would feel like when she saw him again in heaven. Would all the waiting seem like it had only been a matter of days?
     Quickly her mind began to doubt what she had seen so she looked through the back window of the car. It looked just like Jacob from the back as well. When he turned to his right, his profile was like that of Jacob's. Seeing the reflection of his face once again in the outside mirror, she was able to confirm what she had seen. She knew she had to take in everything about this person and the car he was driving. She made a mental note of the color, make and model of the vehicle. It was a bluish grey Honda Accord. In the back seat of his car was a dog that had brown and black fur in its coat. 
     About two weeks later, Jacob's mom and his cousin (who was visiting from Wisconsin) went to the beach.  They parked in the lot near the Coast Guard building.  As they began walking to the beach, they noticed a car backing out.  A dog was in the backseat, so Jacob's mom pointed it out to her niece.  Then it dawned on her that it looked like the dog from the car with "Jacob" in it.  She noticed the car was the same color, make and model.  When she looked at the driver, he was glancing back as he held his cell phone up to his left ear exactly the same way Jacob would hold his cell phone.  It was Jacob again!!!!  She was speechless and could only grab her niece's arm.  That's when her niece (Jacob's cousin) gasped and said, "Oh my gosh!  That guy looks just like Jacob!"
     The crazy thing is that when the two of them went out onto the beach, they both saw another guy who looked like Jacob from a distance.  They even managed to get some pictures of him.  When Raleigh later posted the picture at her MySpace page, she asked people to tell her who was in the picture.  People said it was Jacob and his best friend Bobby.  Unbelievable!
     Jacob's mom felt like God had answered her prayers.  She asked to see Jacob and she did!  She saw him all over the place!  A couple of weeks later as she was telling somene the story of seeing Jacob, her niece sent a message from Miami where she was staying for a business trip.  She was sitting out at the pool of her hotel at the time and she saw a guy who looked just like Jacob!!  She snapped a few pictures and sent them to Jacob's mom.  It was uncanny how much he looked like Jacob.

     On April 19th, UGA had its annual memorial service to remember the students, faculty and staff who had died during the previous year, and Jacob's family was invited to attend.  The whole event was heartbreaking for them, but all the more considering that Jacob's 19th birthday would have been two days later, on April 21st.  As hard as it was to be on campus, Jacob's family was happy to see some of his friends who turned out for the service.  It meant a lot to them that any of his friends would take the time to be there.
     When the service was over, about a dozen of Jacob's friends agreed to gather at a local bar/Italian restaurant with the Nyenhuis family and Mrs. Belt.  As they were headed over there, his parents said they hoped God would allow Jacob to be a part of this gathering in some way.  They knew Jacob would want to see his friends together with his family.
     As it